3 Rules for Raising Kids that Aren't Jerks

When I first became a mother I think one of my biggest fears was ending up with a kid who was a total butt head. I'd taught daycare, volunteered at VBS and ran enough children's church to know they were out there. And while every child is different and there are easily a thousand different factors that can affect how our children turn out I think there are 3 things we can do to keep them from turning into total punks.

1.) DON'T BE A JERK!
You've got to lead by example. Strive to be who you hope they'll become. Want them to be kind, patient, understanding adults who save kittens and sponsor kids? Then try not to chew out the waitress for mushrooms in your dish. Want them to give their siblings time to talk and be heard? Make sure you give your spouse the same courtesy? For the most part your kids don't give a crap what you say but you can guarantee they see who you are.

2.) EMPHASIZE EMPATHY
Everyone big and small could benefit from a healthy dose of perspective teach them how to put themselves in someone else's shoes. When they misbehave ask questions that make them reflect on how that makes others feel and how they would feel in that situation. Part of the reason I think we act like such jerks as adults is because we forget that everyone is human. Teach them to extend the grace we'd hope to receive. Check out this awesome video from Sesame Street where Bruce Banner...I mean Mark Ruffalo helps explain empathy!

3.) KINDNESS OVER MANNERS

If you've ever watched any good 80s movie you know that you can be the classiest, most polished dude in the room and be a total tool. Teaching politeness without principles gives you fakeness. If you teach a child to be kind then please and thank you will be easy to teach. I don't need them to say yes ma'am to someones face and then be disrespectful behind their back. Raise real, authentic, loving, kind kids. After all manners are really just little random acts of kindness. 

Oh and here's a bonus tip: PRAY!!! A LOT!!! The world is hard and tough. It is not easy to be a person of integrity. Often kindness and grace are viewed as weak. Ask God to give them tender hearts and a strong desire to do what's right. If you have a strong willed one, like I do, pray extra hard. I'll be praying with you! 

A Goal Crushers Guide to New Years Resolutions

"I'm going to do P90X want to do it with me?" my husband says. Is this some sort of joke? I've got a bad knee, a 1 yr old and an infant, I didn't do 15 days of a stationary bike with my gym membership last year and he wants me to do 90 days of this crap?? "I don't think I'll be able to do that with my knee, I'll just watch." I said. He plugs in the DVD and there's a guy with a prosthetic leg doing the workout. o_O Next thing I know its 90 days later I've lost 50lbs and maybe finished a thing for the first time ever in my life. It totally changed me and I've been a fighter and a finisher ever since. Here's what I've learned over the last few years that can help you go from quitter to conqueror too. 

1.) START SMALL

     If you're like I was and have been overweight, lazy, etc for years you won't magically transform overnight. This ain't Disney. Instead of trying to workout an hour at 5am every morning, try getting in at least 30 minutes, 3 days a week to start. Too tough and too much all at once is a great way to crush yourself under the weight of your goals, instead of crush them. Ask yourself what change is a step up from where I am but still sustainable. What could you maintain for the next 10 yrs not just the next 10 days. 

2.) CHILL

     Accept the fact that at some point you will stumble. Your goal needs a hefty serving of grace if its going to make it. Last year I set a goal to get my house in order. I made a simple plan that wouldn't overwhelm me. (You can see my plan HERE) Despite how simple it was there were weeks the schedule got crazy and the house got messy. That doesn't mean the plan doesn't work or that I'm not capable of keeping my house in order. It just means that life happened. Grace upon grace momma, don't smother your goals and your will power with perfection. 

3.) CLARIFY

     As a health and fitness coach my inbox has been filled with declarations like "I'm ready to loose weight!" Well yeah, you and everybody else, but are you willing to make changes and do work. You can't set vague general goals and hope they manifest before your eyes. You need a specific, attainable goal and a plan and path to get it done. Instead of saying "I'm going to loose 30lbs this year!" Say "I'm going to stop drinking soda and start working out 3 times a week." A goal like that is something that you can control and measure. Don't make the big picture your goal, make the goal consistency in the tasks that will get you there. 

Applying these tips to your 2017 and goals will be good for your goals and for your heart. No more defeat, no more quitting, no procrastination....not this year! 

Need a little extra motivation to get the job done? Jan. 9th starts my New Years Revolution where we'll be working together to set and crush goals to live a healthy, fulfilling life and making a little prize money to stay consistent. Want more details on how you could join us? Email me at moxiemaefitness@gmail.com

5 Legit Ways to Lose Weight...and Keep It Off.

If I see one more article on "10 crazy ways to lose weight fast" I'm gonna lose my mind. Ladies stop depriving yourself of vital nutrients, wrapping yourself in cellophane,  and drinking hot sauce. (Seriously some of this stuff is ridiculous.) What good is it to get lean if you don't have a sustainable way to stay lean. Here are 5 legit ways to loose weight and keep it off. 

1.) EDUCATE YOURSELF

The more aware you become of the dangers of a sedentary life or the risks of obesity, it'll be easier to make a decision to change. There are a lot of documentaries on Netflix that will unveil exactly what's on the shelves at your grocery store and how it's killing you. Most people have no idea that your favorite breakfast cereal may share ingredients with heavy duty cleaners. Or that the FDA approves a certain amount of bugs in your food. Not kidding! 

Want to jump all in to food education? THIS. o_O
Warning: May keep you awake at night.

2.) EAT CLEAN, REAL FOOD

I've done Atkins. I've done weight watchers. I've done cereal diets. Nothing has helped me to stay lean AND full of energy like clean eating does. It's a simple concept that involves trying to eat food as close to the source as possible. 5 or fewer ingredients in pre packaged foods and an emphasis on lean meats, lots of produce and whole grains. You're immune system will soar, your energy will improve and your waistline will shrink. All without any crazy deprivation. 

I run a FREE Moxie Mom Challenge each month that can help you better understand who to start this sustainable lifestyle. Email me at moxiemaefitness@gmail.com if you want in the next one! 

3.) FIND A COMMUNITY

I run monthly virtual bootcamps because the thing that is missing for a lot of first timers is accountability and support. Something amazing happens when you know someone is waiting for you to show up and is cheering you on to succeed. We were designed by God for connection! A certain amount of obligation is healthy, otherwise we would never do anything. A community will help you push when you just want to binge on cereal and Netflix...not that I know about that or anything. 

4.) MOVE CONSISTENTLY

1 Zumba class a month does not a slender physique make. Make sure you are finding a way to move 3-5 days a week. It not only is good for your jean size but it could be the difference between a long life and a heart attack. For maximum results mix up cardio and resistance training. Weight training burns calories for up to a couple days. Muscle takes more for your body to maintain, so step off that treadmill drop and give me 20. 

5.) COMMIT TO A PLAN

Your goals need to be specific, measurable, and attainable. "I'm gonna start working out." Isn't going to work out. How many days a week will you exercise? What exercises will they be? What do you need to be eating for results?What's on your meal plan for the week? If it's not scheduled and planned it'll be the first thing to go. Overwhelmed and don't know where to start, it's okay I can help! 

And here's a bonus have some flippin' fun! Don't love running, than dance. Hate to lift, get your yoga on! As the old adage says do what you love and it won't seem like work!

I hate meal planning. There I said it.

Cleaning eating, fit mom, health coach surely I meal plan and do so like a boss. Surely not. The thought of locking myself into food choices for the week?? I was having commitment issues. But I knew I had to figure something out, the grocery situation was getting freaking ridiculous. The bill was climbing, I was there 3-4 times a week, my meal planning anxiety was totally cramping my style. I knew I couldn't plan every meal and snack for the week, not I couldn't, I just wouldn't. So here's how me and meal planning made a compromise.

Before April started I planned only dinner for a week. Then I made a list of breakfast, lunch and snack options. That week and those options will repeat itself for the month. We have the same thing every night of the week for the entire month. So for April, Mondays are tacos, Tuesday is spaghetti, Wednesday is breakfast, Thursday is chicken, rice and veggies, Friday is turkey burgers, Saturday is leftovers, Sunday is crockpot pork tenderloin. (Remember those are all clean, whole foods versions of those things!) I break down those meals into the ingredients required and hit up the big box store and stock up on everything I need for 2 weeks worth of meals. (Save the receipt!) On Sunday I cook chicken for lunch salads, prebag snacks for easy grabbing, make meatballs, bake oatmeal cups, etc. If it can be done ahead of time, it's done now. Every night before bed I prep the hubby's work food and take meat from the freezer to thaw for the next day. You can get a better idea of how I prep for the other meals HERE.

Dude! The baby slept through my haircut, and both stores!!! God is good...all the time!

Let's fast forward. 2 weeks have gone by and supplies are low. If your store has shop online, pick up in store like our Sam's Club you're about to change your life. Because you saved the receipt you know exactly what you need whether you shop online or in the store you should be done in no time. Today with baby in tow I was in and out of the big box store in 20 minutes. You're not shopping this time, you did that at the start of the month this time you're grabbing and going. I had to make a second stop to Wal-Mart to get party supplies for my son's birthday this weekend and was still done the whole combined trip in an hour and for less than $300. That's right party supplies and 2 weeks worth of food for $300. And not just any food but lots of fresh, organic, real food!!

Before May we'll sit down as a family and decide what meals we loved, what new recipes we want to try and make our new dinner plans for the month.

Go connect with me on FB and leave your email 

and I'll send you my FREE printable to help you 

go all moxie on your meal prep!

Or email me at moxiemaefitness@gmail.com to snag one! 

3 Day Refresh, Is It Worth It?

That's it we had decided and committed March 21st my friend Mindy and I would take on the 3 Day Refresh. A 3 Day Cleanse that is designed to help your body make a clean break from bad habits which I totally needed coming off a 6 day cruise. Mindy did the smart thing, while I was on the boat drinking coffee 6 times a day and having dessert every night, she was weaning herself off of processed foods and sugar. Oh how I wish I had done what Mindy did, but I did not and I suffered gravely for it. Here's how my 3 days went down.

DAY 1
Off to a great start I was worried about having my Shakeology without almond milk but with half a frozen banana in it, it was just fine! I wasn't even really feeling much from going without my normal morning coffee. Lunch was a vanilla protein shake half an apple and cucumbers with hummus. Thanks to the fact that you can have real food during this detox at no point was I starving. Around dinner I felt a headache coming on. By the kids bedtime I was in full blown break down mode I had chills, my body ached, and my head throbbed. Upon a little research I discovered that when you detox if you have a flu virus or some such mess in your system that your immune system has been staving off it will bubble right up to the top as your body gets rid of toxins. So now I am dealing with major caffeine withdrawal and the flu...awesome.

DAY 2
I woke up feeling like garbage, all of the symptoms that come with the flu were reigning down upon me. I sat and thought for a while, am I going to bail or am I going to stick with it? Even if I went back to my normal clean eating lifestyle it wouldn't get rid of the germs any faster than the cleanse would so it was time to embrace the suck. If repenting from sin felt like detoxing from sugar and caffiene it'd be the straight and narrow for all of us from here on out. Sheesh! Thank goodness you can have hot herbal tea because the chills had me wanting soup or coffee real bad. That day for lunch I had grape tomatoes with avocado, seasoned with a pinch of Himalayan salt, cracked black pepper and garlic powder. This is a cold salad I make in the summer with mozzarella and it is amazing! Went to bed feeling a little bit better, thank goodness the clouds were parting.

3/4 cup of halved grape tomatoes, 1/4 of an avocado diced, sprinkle himalayan salt, cracked black pepper and a pinch of garlic powder

DAY 3
Oh my gosh, am I dying?? If you have the option to do a detox when you are not sick, take that option!! Had my Shakeology at breakfast with frozen blueberries for a vitamin C boost and that delicious avocado and tomato salad for lunch. After lunch my parents watched the kids while I took my first ever detox bath. I went in feeling like death but I must have dipped myself in that healing water 7x cause I came out feeling brand new. lol I still had a little bit of a headache but the chills and body ache were gone! Praise the Lord. Dinner was a recipe for lemony green beans that comes in the booklet and they are delicious! I still wasn't hungry but man I sure was missin normal food. I told my husband after dinner "Can I go to bed now so I can wake up and eat?" hahaha

For a simple detox bath add 1 cup epsom salt and 2 cups baking soda as you draw a hot bath. Soak for at least 30 mins.

DAY 4
WOW!!!! Just call me Lazarus y'all! I was worried that being sick would mess with the results in my energy. All the clients I have that had finished the cleanse boasted of increased energy the next day. Even with the baby waking up at 2:30 (not normal for him) I woke up feeling awesome. And as a bonus I was looking awesome...well my hair was a hot mess but all of my nasty boat bloat I had acquired on the cruise was gone! I lost 4lbs (157.5 to 153.5) and 3 inches off my waist!

GET REAL ALERT

A detox will not give you abs. All it did was reveal all the hard work I've been doing in my workouts 

by trimming the bloat and some fluff. 

If you are thinking about doing the detox I would HIGHLY recommend working your way up to it! It shouldn't take long Mindy started the Wednesday before eating better and did well with it, I had a Cadbury cream egg and a cup of coffee the night before and knocked on deaths door. Obviously if you aren't fighting off the flu you'll also handle it much better.

If you are interested in more information or want to take advantage of this system while its on sale email me at moxiemaefitness@gmail.com or check out the 3 Day Refresh at my virtual store front.

How You're Ruining Your Day, Maybe Your Life

3:45pm it is the hour of my salvation. Its the time my husband walks through the door and I claw against the mat towards the ropes to tag him in. "How was your day?" Here it is my opportunity to let him know just how real the struggle is and banish any ideas that I might be sitting around here eating bon bons...I don't even really know what those are, but they sound good!... As I relive the spills, fights, and missteps I feel even worse about my day.

Today as we stood in line at SAMs Club I was trying not to lose it. They were snappin out and there were 2 out of 20 lines open. They had just done so well at the hair dressers what was going on!!! What about a grocery cart makes every body loose their mind. As I plopped down in the drivers seat after we loaded our industrial size bags of produce I heard the Lord say to me "so what part are you going to let define your day?" I was like the mainstream media (and I am not a fan). Every day Matt comes home from work and I relive the horrors and neglect the highlight reel. With every negative story I retold I was making myself feel worse about the job I had to do. Not to mention they deserved more grace. What would I say about a boss who only ever pointed out my mistakes and never my achievements? I'll tell you it probably would require some editing.

The negative is going to scream in your face momma, you've got to choose to shout the joy louder. Don't ruin your own day! You don't have to pretend like you've had flowers coming out your butt all day, but before you is life and death...chose life!

The Thing About Homeschooling

Here's the thing about homeschooling...sometimes it sucks. Yeah that's right I said it. For all of the homeschool magazines and how-to books no one ever seems to cover the fact that some days the washer will over flow in the middle of math. That some days your...passionately, independent child will shout out random words as he stares off into space instead of willingly reading the words you know that he knows. At mommy school you are the janitor, head master, teacher, plumber, coach and oh yeah, Mom! It's a lot. Like just being a mom is hard enough. It's amazing and fulfilling and important, but its hard. If you don't think it is you're either better than me or taking something and not sharing.

This is our new Bible practice. Be still and know,
lying and listening to scripture quietly.

And here's the other thing, its not for everyone. Some of these homeschool moms get it mixed up like this is our only mission ever in life. Well I'm sorry I just don't agree. I believe we are called for more than just motherhood. The Bible says we are to go into all the world and preach the gospel, that starts at home but it does not end there. If being who you're called to be means they have to be at school that's okay. You may not be able to be a good mom and a homeschool Mom at the same time. If you are called to homeschooling and it is hard, than you have a responsibility to take time to fill your cup. This is not purgatory you are not stuck here. Where the Spirit of the Lord is there is freedom (2 Cor. 3:17) and don't you let any uptight, Abeka lovin mom tell you any different. (If you love Abeka don't get your three ring binder in a knot its just an example.)


These are your responsibilities momma.
1.) Get with God and go where He sends you.
2.) Be a part of your child's education whether it be at home or away.

Notice the laundry in the background...the janitors off today.

You cannot be the best for them, if you are not willing to hear His best for you. For me, right now, I am called to be here. But I like to ask Him every few months whether I'm still supposed to be here. So if you're here with me in the trenches, keep up the good work and cultivate thinkers! If you're hearing this and realize you need to hand them over to Him and send them to school, God speed and I am praying for your momma heart! You will find no condemnation here!

Julia Todd, Moxie Mom

How I'm Getting My Ish Together In 2016

I am really creative! Food, graphics, events, you name it I am a never ending stream of ideas! I'm not bragging I swear just stick with me. I am telling you all this in hopes that it will garner me a little empathy when I tell you that I am a TOTAL SLOB! Or at least that is my natural inclination. My college apartment would have you gladly opting to stay at the frat house. When my husband rode in my car for this first time, his advice was to just send it over a cliff and start fresh. I've gotten much better over the last couple of years. With prayer and sheer will power I have been digging myself out of the clutter infested pit! But I have MAJOR plans for 2016 and so major breakthrough is required! I knew I could do it. After all we serve a God who paints the sunsets and schedules the moon phases, surely I could be both creative and productive. So if you are fellow hot mess like myself allow me to share with you my simple grace filled plan to get my ish together! 

STEP 1: GET A PLANNER 
Last year I started brain dumping. This is a process where the night before I sit down and write down all of the things I need to do the next day. No item is too small. Then I organize them so that the biggest, least pleasant sounding task is first. Now I needed a place to keep my new method, my calendar, my meals, my brain basically all in one place instead of thousands of pieces of paper adding to the mess. I looked at a few and stumbled upon the Emily Ley Simplified Daily Planner. Not only is it sooo pretty, which my creative heart loves, but its simple. It doesn't have a thousand bells and whistles that make me think "should I be keeping track of every time my child has peed??" So now that you have a planner its time for a plan! 

STEP 2: GET A PLAN 
Freakin' laundry y'all!! With 6 people (5 dudes, 1 projectile vomiting baby, and 2 fitness freaks) we have laundry for days!! We been had laundry, you know what I'm sayin? If you want to see the light drain from my eyes plop an over flowing basket of laundry at my feet. I am not exaggerating in the least when I say it is a joy stealing, soul sucker!!! woosa, breathe But unless we want to be the smelly family it must be done! After pouring over a myriad of pins this is the simple plan I created to make progress and not die inside. 
disclaimer: For this to really be effective you first need a full overhaul cleaning, so that you have a clean slate! 

• MORNING: 1 load of laundry in wash (Thats it, just 1! You have no idea how incredibly freeing that is.), 30mins team cleaning one room with worship music on
• LUNCH: 1 load of dishes, put laundry in dryer, have boys do a quick pick up (I advise music and a race for time!)
• WHEN HUBBY GETS HOME: This is the magic part. Stand at the dryer and fold and sort as the clothes come out. Call all responsible parties to put their clothes away. 
• EVENING: 1 load of dishes, wipe down kitchen counters and stove top. 

BOOM! Done. My house looks worlds better, it doesn't stress me out and my oldest son is actually enjoying the worship cleaning sesh. 

STEP 3: GET A GOAL

"no, it’s not your willpower. it’s your “Why Power.” This kind of power will drive you to move mountains, swim oceans and walk through fire to accomplish your goals...The person who has a clear, compelling and white-hot burning reason why will always defeat the best of the best at doing the how. We see this reality played out repeatedly. it’s where greatness and extraordinary achievement comes from." - Living Your Best Year Ever by Darren Hardy No matter what you do or who you are you must have vision. Habakkuk 2:2 tells us to "write down the vision, make it plain." Enter the vision board. This is a great and simple way to really visualize you why. Every time I want to be lazy or procrastinate or get fearful about making a move I picture holding the little girl we'll adopt from overseas. I visualize the sign on the building or the new house big enough for them to run wild through without clipping a table. If I had a nickle for every time... Get a vision of what you want for yourself and for your family. Make it personal, make a plan, pray for it daily and watch things start to shift! 

If you want even more help getting your ish together this year I highly recommend Eat that Frog by Brian Tracy and Somer Dawn's Productivity Academy 

Keep fighting the good fight mommas!! 

P.S. none of these people are paying me or any of that I just think they rock and that you should know. ;) 

Foolish Hope

I carry a genetic mutation that causes polydactyly and syndactyly. "Poly...what now?" Don't worry I didn't expect you to know. It basically means extra digits and webbed digits. It can be treated early on with a couple surgeries and doesn't have a whole lot of affect on how I live my day to day life. My feet are extra sensitive as bones don't align as they should and 2 of my toes are visibly webbed. So no I don't get pumped for flip flop season. All 3 of my sons were also born with it. While it is a blessing compared to some of the things we see at the children's hospital. Taking a 1 year old for 5 hours of intricate surgery and 30 days of recovering in casts is no picnic. The 10th little kid or shoot even adult to ask why your babies toes are stuck together also lacks in appeal. We won't even get into the medical costs for all the specialist.

When I found out I was pregnant with my 3rd and it was also a boy (its more common in males) we started doing everything we had learned to do to win the battle in the spirit. We went to the elders of the church and were anointed. There is no "fervent prayer of a righteous man" quite like the prayers of a mother. I claimed healing and testified to its immanent arrival. We spoke scripture over our unborn son. We prayed in the spirit. Two or more had come in His name. My hope had been built to such a mighty climax, that the day before my scheduled induction I sat in the car and cried thinking of the miracle we were about to witness.

The Lord will perfect that which concerns me; Your mercy, O Lord, endures forever; 

Do not forsake the works of Your hands. Psalm 138:8

Then it happened, 13 hours of labor had passed and we were going to see a miracle, except we didn't. Extra pinkys, extra big toes, webbed middle and ring finger on his right hand, and webbed toes. I felt my heart break in that moment. We did EVERYTHING we were supposed to do. If I were a different woman I probably would have cried right then and there, but I soldiered on like it was no big deal. But it was. When the pediatrician came in and said "webbed fingers and webbed toes, I guess you're the one that gave that to them?" it was a big deal. When I had to call the children's hospital and they knew my name and it was like talking to old friends it was a big deal. For a couple weeks I walked around like a zombie. I didn't want to go to church and answer questions. I didn't want strangers bringing meals and trying to not to look at his hands. I didn't cry until about 3 weeks or so later as I stood over a sink full of dishes and I lost it. And He said to me "My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are My ways, your ways." And quite frankly that wasn't really good enough. 

Fast forward a few months after his surgery. While sitting and praying I heard Him say "the things you battled for have been won. There are things unseen that have been shifted." I thought well if all that was so that my future grandbabies could be set free, it was worth it. I shared with ladies from church the word that was spoken to me and took comfort in that. Almost 2 months after that I got a positive pregnancy test. I can remember talking to my best friend, who knows this battle better than most, and saying "I don't know that I feel like praying for a miracle. I don't know that I am brave enough to hope and have it crushed again." She informed me that not doing so was not an option. (side note: those are the best kinds of friends) Again I am pregnant with a boy. I am now 3 weeks away from my due date. People talk as though we are sure to see it again. Their is no doubt in the OB's mind we will be doing all of that again. This time my prayer is different. "God let me be okay with the outcome." "Don't let my faith waiver if my prayers are not answered." "Guard my heart Lord." Hope would seem silly to most, sometimes it seems silly to me. But I have no other choice, I can't hope for all the others and not for him. I can't let myself believe less than His promises. At the 20 week appointment, without knowing a thing, the ultrasound tech got a super clear picture of both his feet, and said "Look at his cute little toes." Because both are soft tissue issues, they won't show on regular ultrasound, but I felt like he said "It's okay Mom." 

I don't know if he will be born unable to wear shoes until he's 1. I don't know if he'll grow up to be a master swimmer. (we hear that a lot) I don't know if prayers will be answered or not. I do know that He loves me, I know that He has a hope and future for my little man. I know that whatever the deal He is still God and seated on the throne. No matter how many times you've prayed for breakthrough, however many times you have cried in the dark for healing and heard nothing, my prayer is that you would be brave enough to hope. That your faith would look foolish to those who don't know Him. Hang in there, you are shifting the atmosphere. 

Raising Grace

"Stop catching the marshmallows on fire! I swear every F****n time!" This is what I heard from the next campsite as I watched our campfire burn with less passion then this man had for marshmallow roasting procedure. Usually the loud, public use of the F-Bomb would make me roll my eyes but tonight it brought rage as I realized he was talking to tween daughter.

As I sit and think about how I would like to rip into this guy. The Lord reminds me of something He has been speaking to me. "What if the grace I give my children is all the grace I received from my Heavenly Father." You see the crazy thing is without discipleship and the work of the Holy Spirit I could totally be that guy. I mean on a day where my guard is down and my dander is up it may be not but my education that keeps me from rifling through my list of profanities over small things.

I run a fairly tight ship. Respect and hard work are not options here and I'm not apologizing for that. I think the Bible is clear that order, character and effort are necessities to a fruitful life. What I do regret is anytime I've made accuracy of more value than mercy. Does who I am as a mother say to my children come to me, all of you that are heavy laden and find rest, or do I conjure images of lighting bolts? Because if they enter this world and they have learned to work hard but not love fiercely, I have failed.

P.S. I totally yelled while writing this. Grace for us too mommas!

But Why?

I get asked a lot why I would still choose to work out every day and aim for clean eating while I'm pregnant. Several friends have said to me "as soon as I'm pregnant again I'm eating whatever I want". I mean we've certainly earned the right havevn't we? For 9 months we grow, swell and ache...and those pregnancy cravings! There's nothing like a 3rd trimester craving for a bacon cheeseburger to make you realize how little it would take for you to cut someone. So why would I deprive myself the opportunity?

The reason why is the same reason I've chosen this non-traditional career path and the same reason I train outside of pregnancy. I push and train because I believe it is important to God that we are stewards of our bodies. Think about it we could have been designed anyway imaginable and it was God's choice that we be an intricate system fueled by food and strengthened by work. Ps. Rick Warren said "God created it. Jesus died for it. The Spirit lives in it. I'd better take care of it." I do the things that are not easy and require discipline because every time we tell our flesh to sit down and shut its mouth we turn up the volume on the Spirit.

Take your eyes off the bathing suit, off the shorts and focus on the heart of this issue. Gluttony and sloth have become excusable sins in the church. We tell our self its not worth the effort because its vanity, and it certainly could be, but the real reason is we think its about image when really its about honor. God doesn't bless dishonor. Imagine with me that you are adrift at sea. As you cry out to God for help you slowly punch poke holes in your raft. After a while the raft deflates and you drown at sea. Was it God's fault you sank? Now imagine with me you cry out to God for more energy, more confidence, to keep you from the heart disease that plagues your family history, as you pop another can of diet soda. God has not abandoned you to this place, we keep popping holes in our raft. You were made for more. You are capable of more.

This is why I do it and its the very reason I spend every day helping other women push too! Because, you friend, are a masterpiece designed with the very DNA of Christ. I do it because I want you to see what we were made to do! We aren't supposed to be pumping our bodies full of toxins, we were not created to manage our life with pills. You are the dwelling place of the most high God and you are worth the effort! If you know for you this battle has to be won in your heart subscribe to email list and I will send you my list of "Scriptures to Sweat By" so that you can begin to pray the word over your journey to health and wellness!

Pray, Sweat, Eat, Repeat. You've got this!

Women, Weight Lifting, and Why You Should Trade in Your Treadmill

Squats, deadlifts, bicep curls... Am I conjuring up visions of women whose veins pop out further than their chest? Maybe you're envisioning large Anglo Saxon blondes teetering on the edge of roid rage. Let me put your mind at ease from the start those women you envision don't hit the squat rack and magically explode into muscle. That takes extreme dedication, a TON of food, and in some of those ladies cases illegal substances. What if I told you that not only would weight lifting unlock something inside your soul but it could be the key to overcoming your weight loss hurdles and getting the body you've always wanted. Don't believe me? Here are 5 reasons you should trade in the treadmill.

1.) Unleash Your Inner Beastette
Is it not the dream of every woman to walk into a room and feel confident? Being a beast isn't about PR's or getting swole, its about pushing yourself. It's about educating yourself, creating new habits and a better version of you. When you take your "I can't" and turn it into an "I must" something happens inside you. Once you see yourself dedicated, disciplined and pushing through it won't matter if you're in a t-shirt and jeans or in your best cocktail dress you're gonna feel like a million bucks.

2.) Become a Calorie Burning Machine
You spend 30 mins on the treadmill and run a 10min mile, you burn 324 calories or so. 30 mins of weight training only gets you a burn of 97. So far it sounds like cardio for the win right? Now what if I told you once you are done your strength training regiment your body continues to burn calories for up to 72 hrs!!! Cardio you continue to burn for only 3-6 hrs. I don't know about you but I like a good deal. I'll take more bang for my buck every time, thank you!

3.) Eat all the food!
I can not tell you how often I hear "I would work out but I just love food too much." Really? Well great pick up a dumbbell and lets get to work. Because you are now a calorie burning machine you'll require more intake. An average daily calorie count for weight loss on a cardio heavy regiment is about 1400-1600 calories. Take the same person and switch the routine for a strength training routine and you're talking more like 1800-2200 calories a day! Divide those up into 5-6 clean eating meals a day and the weight is going to melt a way. So while all your girlfriends are enjoying their carrot sticks you'll be downing clean eating sweet potato fries and getting lean and mean!

4.) Don't just burn fat, but change your body!
Instead of just loosing a little on the scale what if you could reshape your body and be getting rid of that tricep wave wobble. Thought those wide hips are just in the genes and there's nothing you can do? Think again! Not only can weight training slim you down, but it can create new curves and chisel those problems areas. Can we say hello squat booty!! Beachbody Blog says not to worry about bulking up "women don’t have enough muscle-building hormones to gain a lot of mass like men do." 

5.) Better Body From the Inside Out

Weight bearing activities help you to build and maintain bone mass and prevent osteoporosis. Strong muscles help to support your joints and help keep you from injury and can even improve chronic knee and back pain. When I started P90X 5 years ago my knees were terrible, they constantly ached and back pain was like the guest that over stays its welcome. Now after completing multiple strength training programs I can jump I can squat all with no problem and I no longer wake up with back pain so bad I'm unable to move. A study conducted at the University of Wales in Bangor, United Kingdom, found that mildly disabled participants who lifted weights for 12 weeks increased the frequency and intensity at which they could work, with less pain and increased range of movement. 

So now you know what it can do for you but maybe you're still wondering how to start. There are tons of great blogs about simple weight lifting moves and proper form. I would love to help you like I have helped other women learn to love lifting and change their lives. I can provide you with all the nutritional information, a flexible at home fitness program (you don't even have to find a babysitter!!!), and support you need to crush your goals, just email me at moxiemaefitness@gmail.com. All that is needed to succeed is a committed decision! 

WHAT!!! Dude, I did that!! 

5 Fresh Mother's Day Ideas for the Foodie Mom

I have read "The 5 Love Languages" by Gary Chapman and I have to tell you that I think there is one missing. I am convinced that the 6th Love Language is food. If you bring me food I just assume you love me. When we go on vacation our trip is primarily planned around the places we would like to eat. I see these Pinterest posts on date night ideas other than dinner and I think to myself "Why on earth would you not want food?" I am sure that this connection between love and food explains why I was the only "thick" sister. So if this sounds like the momma in your life here are 5 fresh ideas for a foodie Mother's Day and best of all they can all be done last minute.

1.) GIFT CARD
I feel like that goes without saying. The trick here is to get creative, an Applebee's gift card is not going to cut it friends. Think of her favorite restaurant, look for a local farm or garden that makes their own cheeses or spice blends. This idea works for every budget and can be picked up quick.

2.) BLUE APRON
This is a great idea for the busy foodie Mom. What Mom wouldn't love 3 meals worth of ingredients and recipes delivered right to their door. We were gifted a weekly box from Blue Apron a few years back and I have to say it was really cool! All of the ingredients pre-measured come in a ice packed cooler right at your door. Our box had an amazing kale and chicken caesar salad which started us on a kick of kale in our salads.

3.) GRAZE

If you've got a crunchy foodie Mom these boxes come pre-filled with 8 healthy snacks for them to munch on. There are 100s of snacks to choose from so you can pick out her favorites. Not sure what she would like you can get a Graze voucher and let her choose for herself. 

4.) CSA SUBSCRIPTION

Nothing says love like a box of local, fresh produce every week. If you are unfamiliar, CSA stands for community supported agriculture. You buy a share of produce from your local family farm and each week they give you a portion of what is fresh, ripe and fabulous. Our local CSA, Fifer Orchards, even gives you the option to add grass feed beef, fresh local eggs and more to your box. This is a pricier option so it'd be good to split amongst some adult siblings! 

5.) COOKING CLASSES

Is your Mom a great baker but not so great with the knife skills or maybe she's a sushi fiend. Sushi making classes, or cooking lessons are a great way for her to do what she loves and to also get out of the house for a bit. If you are in the Salisbury, MD area I suggest calling my friend over at the Country Tart and booking your Mom an in home dinner party/cooking class. Lynn comes to your house with the food and the know how and shows you and 8-10 of your friends how to prepare a meal. 

So this year save your money on flowers she can't eat, and candles she doesn't need. Get her what she really wants...FOOD! 

Act Like You Know

This last Christmas we bought everyone in the house a Nerf gun and had an epic Nerf battle. We later took the Nerf guns with us to my Mother's house and set up a tactical op as we entered the house. They never saw it coming. I was so proud of my self. I had picked a present that everyone could use, it required us to be together and active and everyone really enjoyed it. Do you know where those guns are right now? They are outside in the dirt. I saw them yesterday as I went to the compost bin. And Lord only knows where the darts for the guns have gone to. I was so disappointed! Didn't they know that was a special gift, and thats not how you take care of things!...Don't you know. 

Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. Then the man said, “This is now bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman, for she was taken out of man.” Gen. 2: 22-23

What a precious gift you are. How do you think it makes the Father feel when we neglect the gift? I have to imagine it is much like I felt seeing those guns jammed full of dirt. Our bodies are outstandingly intricate. So many things working together just so we can blink. It is our duty to steward all of the intention that was put into our design. He loves you, act like you know. 

Here on Day 2 pray that the Lord would make you aware of His love for you and for you to reciprocate  that love in our actions and choices. 

So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. 1 Cor. 10:31

Another amazing photo taken by Julia Kellett 

Pray Your Way Thin

Today is the start of a 21 day challenge group I have going that will focus on body image and identity just as much as nutrition and fitness. I think this is the key to a life of health and wellness, as opposed to a moment of success. What a shame it would be to get to the end of journey and be able to lift a barbell but lack the confidence and peace to lift up your eyes.

Emotional wounds can so often block our progress and create wounds that make us doubt our value. Words and curses people have spoken over us we allow to become who we are. I can remember a family member saying to me "she'll always be heavy just like her Dad." I let that bitter, wounded individual wound me. Perhaps there is someone like that in your life. Let me be the voice of reason...What other people think about you is none of your business. What does the father in heaven say?

If I were to owe you $100, and I handed you a $5 bill saying "Here is your $100." would you accept that? I should think not, because you know what everyone knows. I don't get to determine the value of that bill, because I did not create it. Just as you or anyone else does not get to determine your value.

I would love for you to join us on the prayer portion of our journey. Pray this prayer with us, forgive those who have tried to devalue you, ask God to seek out the wounds and heal them. Then move forward prepared to conquer this battle!

Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. 

Psalms 139:2-3

HUGE thank you to the beautiful (inside and out) Julia Kellett for letting us borrow some GORGEOUS photos for the back drop of these prayers. Go check out her work and blog HERE. 

The Thick One

I grew up in a blended family. I have 3 sisters and 2 brothers. As I grew up my time would be split between two different houses, but wherever I found myself I was always the chunky one. All of my sisters are naturally slender, my biological sister is flat out skinny. I can remember going back to school shopping and hating every minute of it, as I tried on outfit after outfit in the juniors section with no luck. Not only was I thicker than them but I was taller than almost all the girls I knew. Looking in the mirror I looked like some bad SNL joke with buttons stretched tight and hemlines mid-shin. Girls were supposed to love shopping, why did I find this so miserable an experience? I had let my shirt's XL label, define me. I felt like a pair of elastic waisted, stirrup pants remember those in a room full of skinny jeans.

If this is you sweet friend, hear me now. Who you are is enough! If we are created in the image of Christ that means somewhere at our core we have everything we need to be the best that we can be! You were hand crafted, designed, fashioned before there were stars in the sky. If someone had used an unattractive, bulky frame to showcase their Picasso, would it make the art worth any less? Absolutely not! You are valuable, you are beautiful, you are worth the effort.

Even after a 50lb weight loss (thank you P90X) sometimes I forget I'm not a "big girl" anymore...although at 5'10" I'll never really be small. What I do remember is that whether big or small, husky or scrawny I am awesome! And because I am awesome and God took the time to create me with such precision I am worth the effort to stay healthy. My body is a temple and so I will choose to treat it with respect, both in how I handle it and how I speak about it. I will choose to run the race of life with endurance! (Heb. 12:1)

That's me...true story! 

If you're stuck letting your clothes tag, label your heart I want to help you. No more miserable in your own skin. No more negative talk about your vessel. It's time to change your perspective and your body. You can do it, because greater is He that is in you. You are worth it, because you were wonderfully and beautifully made. Comment below to get info on how to join this group, or message me over on Facebook www.facebook.com/moxiemaefitness 

It's time to sow hard work and consistency

and reap confidence and positivity. 

Why turning 29 will be harder than turning 30.

Tomorrow I turn 29. I don't usually make too much of a fuss over my own birthdays. They don't bum me out and neither do they make me excited, its just whatever. Until this morning. I woke up this morning to find out some friends of ours had gotten some great news. I was so excited for them, but it quickly turned into being bummed out for me.  Tomorrow I turn 29...and all of these things I thought I would have accomplished are still just dreams.

I have no bum steer to blame for where I find myself. Its because I am a dreamer and have yet to become a doer. I thought by now I would have opened my own coffee shop and would be, at least, a moderately successful business owner. At this point I would settle for struggling business owner just to see the thing come to life. I thought we would be in the adoption process by now, but with each bleak bank balance I feel like we are further and further away. Its not that I lack vision, its action that eludes me.

I am afraid that this coffee shop that I can see and smell when I close my eyes will be a bust. That this thing I have made so much a part of me will be a flop. So out of fear I don't take any leaps. I have had multiple opportunities slip through my fingers as I am almost paralyzed by the fear of failure.

I can see an adorable little Ugandan or Haitian girl(s) as a part of our freak show. I believe it is what I was born to do, like I believe I need air to breathe. So why don't I already have a savings account set up to plan ahead for paying for the high cost?...lack of action.

As I scan over the landscape of 28 it smells stagnant. Turning 29 is hard because I feel as if I have wasted the 365 days leading up to it. I had a beautiful baby boy and I know I did lots of things so I know its not for nothing, but I didn't really make it something either. 30 will be different. 29 will be the year I rise out of the ashes of inactivity and make it count. My plan is to live enough and work enough and share enough and care enough to make up for 28 and every other year that came before it. 30 will not be this hard!

You see then that a man is justified by works,and not by faith only. James 2:24

Let the Good Times Roll - Road Trips with Toddlers

We woke up early, packed the car, loaded the kids, and prepared to embark on our journey. I have been to dangerous, war torn countries, flown countless hours across open ocean, and sat in a dirty airport for hours as an assassination attempt was made just outside the walls. But I don't know if I had ever been as nervous as I was as when my Mother and I decided to take my two sons on a sixteen hour car ride to the pan-handle of Florida. As the doors closed I knew our fate was sealed. There would be no turning back, once we left that was it. If they decided to flip out it would surely be a 16 hour drive into the mouth of hell itself. Once we were further South than the oldest had been before he started to ask every 5 minutes "Is this Florida."...We were in Maryland. I looked at my mother and calmly proclaimed "We're screwed!" But it wasn't that bad, seriously! I brought the DVD player and plenty of movies but they were so engaged in the other things I got I think they watched one movie in 16 hours of driving. How did I do it? How did I journey into Mordor with two tiny hobbits and emerge victorious?? I will tell you!

You may know by now I am adamantly opposed to winging anything. You have to have a plan! And my plan was almost full proof it was a multi-faceted distraction technique that kept us all sane for the long haul. 

First here are my must haves for any car ride longer than a couple hours. 

• Dollar Store Cookie Sheet - Do not leave home without this!! It is a magnet board, it is a food tray, it keeps crayons from rolling away. I even used permanent marker to draw train tracks on ours to they had a little track for their cars and trains. Seriously you'll wonder why you never used one before. 
• Melissa and Doug Reusable Sticker Pads - I mean seriously genius! These keep the boys busy for hours and at $5 for infinite possibilities it is totally worth the buy. I took the reusable stickers and put them in a ziploc bag taped to the back of each scene sheet. This kept them from getting dirty and not sticking, as well as, kept them from getting lost in the seats or on the floor. 
• Audio Books - Go to your local library and get a few of these for free. Since we have two boys I always check out a second copy of the book so they can both flip through and look at the pictures and words as we go.  
• Healthy Snacks - Let me stress the healthy part of this. The last place you want your kids to have a sugar high is locked in and strapped down for multiple hours. Why would you do that to yourself?? My favorites are Happy Family Brands Organic Baby Food Pouches  and homemade trail mix. 

Next make a schedule. I know that may sound weird for just sitting in the car, but if you plan out your activities and games being sure to spread them out it will keep them from being going through everything in the first few hours and then being miserable for the last 10! I printed "train tickets" for them and every hour of the trip I would ask for their tickets and punch a hole. They looked forward to me bellowing every hour in my best old timey voice. "Tickets, tickets please. Next stop Cucamonga!" Then I had a brown paper bag scheduled for every 2 hours of the trip. The bags were filled with dollar store finds. Magnets for their cookie sheets, silly putty, sunglasses, a new hot wheels car, and snacks to name a few. When you stop for the bathroom really encourage them to move. Have everyone do jumping jacks or roll down a hill, something to exert some energy. I brought a book with me with fun facts about the states, when we'd enter a new state I would read about it. I showed them a picture of the state flag and you would have to shout out each time you spotted it! 

I could go on for hours, but I think you get the idea! So don't be afraid, take the trip, enjoy the journey! Godspeed friends! 

The boys with their tickets!